Fighter

A fighter not a lover
And no longer shall I be
One that's subject to another
For now all that's left is me

A dream, a fairy tale fantasy
Of what my life would be
I didn't know, didn't ask myself
If there was more to see

I know I must look elsewhere
For the reason that I'm here
Perhaps compassion is a closer role
To be a slayer of petty fears

I want to be what I'm here for
Which only I can say
Is this just one more defense move
Or rationale to stay?

My feelings are a greater strength
Following my heart is wise
Although I must be dilligent
For my heart sometimes lies

It's so easy to forget all this
And slip back to my role
A fighter seeking romance
But still out in the cold

A fighter, not a lover
Is my mantra of the year
Eventually it will fit well
And not bring me to tears.

--Peter Johnson, April 2003